Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus—Philippians 4:6-7
After working on other author-related projects for two hours, I’m writing this post at 3:00 a.m. I can’t sleep. Is there anyone out there who can relate? It doesn’t take much these days to get me tossing and turning, and trust me, my life is easy.
I chaired a meeting last Sunday to finalize the plans for an upcoming tea party our church is hosting. We’d decided it would be better received than the typical Mother’s Day gifts passed out to all the women—gifts that are rarely used and later found stuffed in the back of a desk drawer or tucked away on a shelf in the closet.
And as I went over my notes, line by line, a fellow committee member and good friend said in her sweet Southern twang, “I think you’re worrying too much over this. It’ll all come together just fine.”
My comeback, though honest, made her point. “Someone has to worry.”
If none of us is fretting over the details, how will everything be “just fine”?
I’d like to say I’m not a worrier, but that would be a lie. I don’t wring my hands in despair, come unglued at the slightest mishap, or snap at those around me. Instead, I don’t sleep. I toss and turn at night and try to pray, but I can’t focus. Those pesky problems crowd out the voice of the Lord, and I’m left with bleary eyes and a fuzzy head the next day.
God has been so good to me. He led me to walk away from my publisher, blessed me with the rights back to all my books, and gifted me with an amazing, supportive husband. But opportunity requires adjustments, and this old dog sometimes wonders if it’s possible to learn new tricks.
I’m a planner for this very reason. I like to have to-do lists, notes, and calendars filled out just so. Each accomplishment I can tick off brings a little more peace and productivity into my life. How do you eat an elephant? I’ve been taking chunks out of that pachyderm for months—almost a year—and he keeps growing. So, I plan.
Nothing throws a planner off faster than the unexpected. An emergency vet appointment because my puppy won’t quit fussing with his ears. A malfunctioning computer or other tech issues that turn into time suckers. A lengthy phone call from one of the kids (I can’t not answer when they call.)
Then something tragic occurs. A scary diagnosis. A sick child. A death in the family.
Earthly concerns become insignificant in light of eternity. I’ve always taught my children to have a backup plan in case things go awry. I know people who have backup plans for their backup plans. And truthfully, I’ve been that person in the past.
A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps—Proverbs 16:9.
There was a time I had my entire life figured out. If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your agenda and expect Him to bless it.
When I take the time to ruminate over the twists and turns my life has taken, I see the hand of God so clearly. While I’m fretting over non-essentials, He’s working everything out in the background. There is always a reason for detours far greater than my finite mind can grasp, and yet I continually forget that in the moment.
I’m learning to lean into prayer (when I can clear my mind enough to focus on the Lord) rather than work like a fiend rearranging my calendar to accomplish everything on my to-do list—then lie awake at night fretting over the details.
Maybe that’s why I’m a month behind my self-imposed deadline for my latest book. Stuff happens, but somehow, it will all work out according to God’s plan. It’s not up to us to figure it out; just trust.
Charles Spurgeon penned it perfectly in Streams in the Desert by L.B. Cowman. At the end of the May 3rd entry, it says, “My case is urgent, and I do not see how I am to be delivered; but this is no business of mine. He who makes the promise will find ways and means of keeping it. It is mine to obey His commands; it is not mine to direct His counsels. I am His servant, not His solicitor. I call upon Him, and He will deliver.”
I do not doubt that whatever trials Charles Spurgeon faced were far greater than mine, but no matter how insignificant we might feel, God doesn’t see us that way. What an incomprehensible blessing that is.
So, when things go awry, and you’re caught up in the moment, remember that the Lord already knew about it, planned for it, and will deliver you from it.
Now, if I can only take my own advice, I’ll be sleeping like a baby.
